Hey ladies, how are you doing? I just thought to make this blog post very interactive and brief. Just want something different! I will be asking some questions below so please kindly let me know your thoughts and contributions. You can write them down in the “comment” box below 🙂
So today, I’ll be talking about the difference between minding your own affairs and getting involved in people’s affairs. There are times in our lives where we must learn to stay out of people’s issues, simply because it does not involve us. In 1 Thessalonians 4:9-12 (NIV), we see Paul stressing on the importance of learning not to depend on anyone and being able to mind your own affairs. It reads “(9) Now about your love for one another we do not need to write to you, for you yourselves have been taught by God to love each other (10) And in fact, you do love all of God’s family throughout Macedonia. Yet we urge you, brothers and sisters, to do so more and more, (11) And to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you, (12) so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody”.
Questions and Interaction
- So if I may ask, when last did you get involved in something you were not supposed to?
- What is your concern about someone else’s success that you can’t get your life together?
- Why are you so worried about what others are doing that you fail to realise you are precious with or without the material possessions?
- Could it be possible that you are so dependent on people to accomplish your hearts desires and afraid to do it without them?
- Are you someone who can stand on your own two feet when life seems to be unfair, or are you trying to make your neighbors life frustrating so that you will feel comfortable in your own mess?
(Please choose one and answer below)
Ladies, I suggest you choose one and let it sink into your Spirit and question yourself if you have ever been like that. Ask God if this is me, how will you be able to handle it. These questions are common to the majority of our women today. We are very quick to either judge, look down on, or even over-estimate ourselves just to cover up our flaws. I know of a lady who told me that this man asked her a random question about what she was doing at the moment. She told the man that she was working in retail. The man then asked if it was related to her degree, she said it is similar but not the same. The lady was frustrated that he kept asking her about what she was doing. Why was she frustrated? Because he hardly speaks to her. It can be so upsetting when people randomly pop into your life and tries to find out what you are doing. I would assume the man may not even help to find her dream job so there was no need of asking. Because once someone asks about you, there are either two reasons as to why they have asked:
- To help you find your job in your related field
- To be curious and not help at all!
Ladies, it is not advisable to tell everyone your problems. God has given you the wisdom to discern right from wrong so that you will know who to express how you feel. I take God as my greatest example to date; He is my real and secure confidant, the one I can speak to about anything! Someone who will NEVER JUDGE ME, or make me feel unworthy about myself. Because for all I know, human beings are very inconsistent; they are with you today, tomorrow they become your enemy. For why? (LOL!)
With God Himself, He is a very reserved and respected Father. We must take Him as our greatest example because He does not involve Himself in our problems if He is not wanted or called. Some of us still depend on man to help us with our problems, but it is not working the way we expected it to. A friend sent this to me earlier today:
“Trust God were you cannot trace Him. Do not try to penetrate the cloud He brings over you, rather look to the bow that is on it. The mystery is God’s; the PROMISE IS YOURS. Stop trying to figure God out! When will you realise that God is God? Just focus on Him and remember His ways are not our ways”.
Indeed, His ways are surely not our ways. We cannot expect God to fix our situations if we have not called upon His Name. The same way you have an exam, if you need help and you know of someone in your class that is academically brilliant, surely you can be confident enough to ask them for help.
God ain’t no hide and seek God! When you need Him, you can find Him; it is really up to you to decide. A friend sent me a quote that said “A private life is a happy life”, and indeed it is true! I believe what can be frustrating the most is when people promise to do something with you, but then comes up with another story. You have the choice to either let it affect your whole day and be miserable, or just shake it off and have peace of mind. You do not always have to call a friend to do things with you. If you are someone who likes company, I challenge you TODAY to enjoy your own company! Do things by yourself without having people around. See how independent and free you’ll become! It’s an amazing feeling! I know before when I was a teenager, I really disliked going places on my own, but now I really enjoy it, because I had learnt from my past that people will always disappoint, but I chose to have Peace by just living the life that God promised me.
When you are sitting for your exam, does any of your friends share the chair with you? Impossible! There are some things you will have to do without people, and it will help so much in not only being wholly dependent on God, but minding your own affairs. I have realised that getting involved in people’s concerns can be dangerous. You can try to sincerely help someone, and because you were involved in their issue, they would suspect that you were the culprit. Stay away from people’s drama unless they tell you to be involved or ask you for help/advise. Be particularly careful when talking about other people to your friend. The person you are informing has another friend! Wow oh wow I learnt this at a young age! I realised that any problem with my friends would be consulted with God or the person directly. It would not be passed on to someone else to avoid more complications.
Ladies, when you learn to mind your own affairs, you will continue to have inner peace because your mind is not focused on other people’s issues. You will be at rest and won’t need to worry yourself because God takes care of His people. Enjoy the life that God has given you. Please do not misunderstand me, it is very good to help people in love, but you can still love someone from a distance. Furthermore, when you can discern something that will affect you (changing of attitude and potentially your lifestyle), that is where you need to ask yourself “Am I really needed in this?”. You may just make matters worse. If you are stuck, speak to God or a trust family member/friend and see how they overcame their interferences with other people. Ladies, you are not alone in this walk! I know for some of you, yours hearts are here to serve and help people get better, but honestly ask yourself, how many people can you serve at a go? God has given each one of us a gift. We must learn to stand still and let God do the work. You can’t keep taking things into your own hands, so that everyone can hail you as hero. No no no, that is not your job. Whether you try to help or not, some unfortunately won’t see the best in you, so why strain yourself?
Look to Jesus because He is the only one that grants REAL PEACE OF MIND! I myself have learnt to just keep myself to myself until God tells me otherwise. He sees all our hearts, and if we are Spiritually strong, we will know when to help our fellow sisters, and when to stay out of ones situation. In other words, we must learn to respect people’s privacy! Any change that comes from our interference in the lives of others is merely the result of human effort and is worthless in the eyes of the God, who has established a plan in which He and He alone is able to affect real change. Our efforts to reform ourselves and others will never be equal, nor will they ever be an acceptable substitute for God’s covenant plan of redemption; a plan that absolutely requires the individual, personal participation of both man and God for its fulfillment.
Remember that some people are anointed to get you in trouble, so before you force yourself in getting involved in someone else’s business, live in such a way that if anyone should speak badly of you, no-one would believe it!
You all are amazing, thank you for reading this interactive blog post. Also please keep the comments rolling as I’d like to hear your thoughts about minding people’s affairs.
Your Sister in Christ x