Step Back

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Your worth is what you believe in, how you see yourself and how you speak to yourself. What negative lies have you been saying to yourself or allowing your mind to control? 2016 has taught me the importance of stepping back from certain situations including people; learning not to retaliate but pray instead to keep my focus on track, being aware of the negative assumptions that play my mind, trying to make people happy, most importantly RECIPROCATION! <<When I talk about this, I don’t mean give and it shall be given back on to you because we are taught to give. I am speaking from a relational and friendship perspective because there will be instances where we invest so much in others that we don’t always see the equivalent result or return.

As you develop in life, you also develop in relationships and friendships. There are some connections that you will have with people that may benefit you, or leave you stuck. There are others that may try to make issues worse, but you choose to surpass it and overcome. It takes a lot of strength, wisdom, and discernment from God to keep your Spiritual eyes open and alert of the signs, whilst being able to control and take responsibility for your emotions. When my Spirit is troubled, instead of wasting precious time trying to find out the issue, I pray then step back from the situation to allow God to have His way.

I remember having a conversation with a dear sister of mine; when she listened to what I was saying,  God used her to inform me that I was covering up and trying to make excuses for someone, but she knew that it should not have been the case. What I am trying to say is that when you make an effort with people, and you can sense that the effort coming back is not as genuine as you thought it would be, that is the time for you to step back and see where you stand. It is time-consuming and draining to keep people in your mind that do not have you on theirs; in fact, those who have the time to speak with others but not you is a sign that they have already categorised their priorities.

This is why I will forever love God because He has no favourites, nor does He hold our faults against us. I have been in so many situations where I know that God has told me about a situation and I choose to ignore it making but then ended up broken because I did not listen. Have you been there? It applies to everything in life; relationships is a two-way process; friendship is a two-way process. What you put in should be what you get out. If you have people in your life who are not adding any value, not shaping you in any way or form, not challenging you or bringing out the best in you, please question it.

It is not healthy to have dysfunctional surroundings, pretending to be happy, or fearful that people will leave your life. When God tells you to let go of something or someone, do not hesitate, because remember not everyone will be for you. Not everyone was for Jesus Himself, so what makes you think that everyone will be for you? I’ve learnt to take breaks whilst working on myself and with others because it gives me time to reflect, to really analyse those who have added VALUE AND WORTH in my life. To appreciate those who have invested their time in prayer, fasting, fellowship and socialisation. In fact, I have even learnt to thank those who put pressure on me, looked down on me and spoke about me because it all equates to the strength that God has given me for the road ahead.

Stepping back is good, and should be done once in a while. Never be afraid to let people go, because I strongly believe that what is for you SHALL be for you and nobody can take that away! Remember God sees through our hearts so whatever plans people may have against you, stand still and firm so that God will intervene; He is a just God and knows what He is doing. He will allow people to treat you funny and feel alone just so they can see the Glory of God in you. It is good to be afflicted according to David in Psalm 119:71 because without the trials and tribulations, how will others be encouraged? David had to encourage Himself in the Lord because he knew the anointing on his life. King Saul hated David with such great passion because of the way others loved him, that despite his negative attitude, David chose to surpass it by seeking God in prayer. He could have executed Saul but chose to let go. This takes maturity and a consistent yearning that seeks after God. David was a focused man, not someone that withers like the wind, or changes because people change.

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What you go through should be able to encourage another person; it is not meant to be a time to fight the process to get comfortable again. God wants us to move when we are happy, and when we are discouraged. No matter the situation know that everything (good and bad) will work out for your favour (Romans 8:28). I stand firmly on this knowing that every good work I do will return to me 100 fold. We have to believe that our works are not in vain and whether people appreciate us or not, we are not obliged to change for anybody, other than our Father. Learn to appreciate yourself before you allow anyone to appreciate you because your worth comes from what you believe in. Remember that not everyone will honour what you do, but when you can honour yourself that is a perfect gift. God is the PERFECT MATCH-MAKER. He knows the right people in your life and will remove those who won’t add value.

Do not try to force anything to happen in your own strength, it is dangerous. I learnt very much about this. You can help people, but only to an extent. If they appreciate it praise the Lord, if they don’t, thank Him for the experience and keep it moving. God did not call us to make everyone happy. God is the one that understands the hearts of man, so please save your time and mind from being abused. Start from yourself; learn to treat yourself well and allow God to be in the centre. Let Him be your true focus, and remove the negative assumptions that block your mind to enjoy life.

Stepping back is needed; if Jesus was able to step back and pray without His Disciples, surely we too can step back from certain situations that weigh us down to gain strength for a new day. Learn to let go and let God; give yourself the Peace that God promised you (Phillippians 4:6), and most importantly don’t let your heart be troubled (John 14:1). Step back and run to Jesus, He won’t disappoint you 🙂

Peace & Blessings.

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There is a Relationship between Pressure & Power

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There is a strong relationship between your pressure and your power. The amount of pressure will depend on your ability to be able to function on the level exposed to you. Sometimes, God will bring certain situations to test your Faith. For this reason, it is your Faith that will enable God to move according to how much you want Him to. If you have set goals to achieve for the remaining year, what are you doing about it now to obtain them? Are you putting enough pressure on yourself to get them done? It could be that you desire clear skin or want to be healthy. Okay, that is a start, now that you have identified what you want to improve on – remember that your thought like can contribute to your well-being also!

So what is the action plan you have created to make this happen? It could be wearing less or no make-up at all, drinking lots of water, having enough rest and eating more fruit and veg, as they are all contributing factors, but essentially being able to feed your mind with positive thoughts because remember that what you think about on the inside will gradually penetrate from the outside.

Our minds are so sensitive and with pressure, it will produce power that you did not know was already in you. However, we must always remember that it is not in our strength that we are strong, but God Himself that freely gives it to us.

“Power is birthed through rejection, pain, isolation, betrayal, and what contributes to this is the pressure you put yourself into”. 

How many of us today can honestly say that where we are right now is caused by the way we think? I remember having a conversation with God, expressing how thankful I was for how far He brought me. This time last year I was not in the greatest position. Today, I am in a better position where I achieved so much including writing my first book “It’s Time to Heal” on Amazon, being able to travel to Italy despite me not working at the time, having my first property position, and so much more that words cannot express – God has truly been Faithful, some of the things I don’t deserve, some of the things I did not pray earnestly for, God has been extremely Faithful and I want to use this time to encourage you that whatever you have been asking God to do for you, HE WILL DO IT IN HIS TIME. Just trust Him and relax.

If you have been keeping up to date with me, you would have read my previous blog posts the pattern of rejections I received from different companies that did not accept me for a position, the stress and sleepless nights of looking for a job was so serious. The pressure I received from this experience enabled me to receive power from God to know how to handle rejection and still remain calm. If not for the pressure I received from struggling in the past, where would I have received His power to obtain all that God has granted me. I am not only just talking from a possession’s perspective, it is also HIS PEACE that He has given me; I was distracted by so many situations that did not feed my mind positively at all, but now God has given me a calm mind to remain focused on Him.

But please do not get me wrong, my mind does wonder at times because that is the way we are functioned, however, He always knows how to draw me back to Himself, and He will surely do the same for you too. Our focus should constantly be on God at all times so that we are able to hear His voice and understand where He is taking us. We cannot afford to be distracted by anything because God has given us His Word to reflect on.

The Bible is a seed – it is our baby that every time we study the Word, we are feeding that seed and it gradually starts to grow in our lives, making us better people. 

The one thing we cannot run from are tests – we will encounter various tests but it is a chance for us to use the initiative and pray, seek and surrender all to God, rather than trying to fix ourselves. We all need support and it is vital to know where the support comes from. A test could be applying the Word into our daily lives; where 1 Corinthians 13 speaks about love, how are we applying this into the lives of others around us? Or maybe the Fruits of the Spirit in Galatians 5:22-23 <<<< now this cannot be handled lightly. We will truly be tested on our fruits. The fruits I am currently asking God to help me with are patience and self-control. Pressure can make you dysfunctional, but when you learn how to manage your emotions and give yourself the patience to overcome the situation you are facing, the problem will eventually become lighter.

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Ladies, always remember that the greater the pressure, the greater the blessing. Stop crying over what you lost and learn to thank Him in the process of silence. I have realised that God is not a God of detail, so He won’t say much. You could be pressured to find a new job because the one you are currently in is not what you initially desired, or you may be an insecure woman who secretly competes with other people, and this has an affect on how you handle people, believe me, these are real life issues. There are men who may be insecure but because of pride, they mistreat women, not recognising their value.

I won’t go into much detail but two ladies that I met this year informed me about what they were going through – (quite similar situations); tears were falling down my eyes because what I was asking for was what they already have, but the pressure that comes with the blessing is so severe; it is so heavy that one must learn to endure the pain and keep it moving.

I’ve learnt that in the process of asking God for our hearts desires, we must be spiritually, mentally, emotional and physically stable so that when we identify our blessings, we are able to receive it with joy, not stiffness. I would strongly dislike buying a house if I do not have the financial means, or being pressured to get married when God is still working on me internally. The situations we go through must enable us to grow and become better individuals, and we must be able to identify them quickly before it controls us.

Pressure, on the other hand, can work out for our good if we know how to handle them because it can enable you to challenge your level of thinking in a way that where you used to put yourself down, it will teach you how to lift yourself up. You may ask how is pressure good and where does pressure come from? It can come through social media, our thoughts, friends, family, men, couples, celebrities, the list can go on. Why should our minds be filled with what other people desire us to be and not what God has called us to be? Pressure can trigger your mind and helps to change your pattern of thinking quickly so that it does not affect where you are going.

As a result, learn to give your mind the tender care it desires. God did not create you to be dysfunctional but to be relational in order amplify your Faith and those around you. When I was looking for a scripture to support this statement,

James 1:3-5 reads: You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colours (4) So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way (5) If you don’t know what you’re doing, pray to the Father. He loves to help. You’ll get his help, and won’t be condescended to when you ask for it”

I want to leave you with the scripture; please meditate and study it over and over again when you feel overburdened. God is with us all, but above all remember there is a strong correlation between our pressure and God’s Power.

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Deepest Darkest Doubt

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Are you a doubter? If you are, read on. It is a natural feeling to worry but what do we do when it becomes too heavy for us to handle? Doubt is not our friend and it should not even be entertained. Your thoughts can keep you up at night if you don’t know how to put them to bed. Do you know you have full authority over your mind? It is so critical that we learn to keep at ease when issues arise. We all have a dark side in our lives, but there is also an opportunity for a light to shine in our path. That light is your thoughts. We can turn negativity into positivity. But it all starts with YOU!

I was putting myself down the other day because work was getting on top of me. I wanted to show my leader that I was highly capable of fulfilling all my assignments on time and meeting my targets. To my surprise, the same issue came out, and it’s not that I was doing it intentionally. Baring in mind that I am new to the industry, I just wanted to demonstrate and prove that I can handle it. When I arrived home, I started crying in my heart assuming that I wasn’t fit enough for the role. The next few days I came back to work, but before I did, I asked God to give me the strength for me to work twice as better than I did before.

The way God works is just amazing! I asked a work colleague of mine to give my some advice on how I can improve my performance. He gave me the most effective routine to do, and when I used that route, I started seeing change. I also informed my colleague that I kept on repeating the same issue I was experiencing at work. He said he went through the same issue, still being there for over four months. The way my heart dropped! After all this time, I was doubting and stressing myself over something that other people do. At that moment, that was where God’s Peace was present because He told me I was worrying too much, that I am not working to please anyone but only Him.

This is why I can’t emphasize enough on the thoughts we think about because they can take root in our lives if we do not know how to handle them on time. I could have put myself down, but I realized that God did not put me in the position I am in for nothing. I am there because He knows I am highly capable of exceeding my expectations. This is a message for the doubters who don’t feel anything good will come out of their lives or those that see their lives as nothing because their questions are not being answered. Your deepest darkest doubt is the greatest opportunity for the Father to speak to you, allowing Him to minister to your sensitive parts.

Your doubt is an opportunity to allow the Father in to heal and soothe your broken parts. Remember, we will not always understand life, and that is okay because we know that God is the Author and Finisher of our Faith. He sees in our future, however, we don’t, and for this reason it is an opportunity to trust Him more when we are feeling discouraged. Our pain should remind other people that they can find true rest. When I used to go through certain situations, I wouldn’t feel the need to tell anybody, simply because I didn’t see it helping anyone. But having told people my story, it has changed the lives of a few around me, and I can only thank God for that.

When doubt comes, just say these few words:

‘Dear doubt, God is bigger than you, so stop trying to play with my mind’.

You would realize that the more you declare that God is bigger than any obstacle in your life, they will eventually start getting smaller, and what used to affect you doesn’t anymore. This is the life that God destines for us to live; a life full of freedom, happiness, joy, love, peace and calmness. He wouldn’t want us waking up in the morning, the first thing being on your mind is how to pay the bills. Although this is important, it should not be the first priority because it will encourage doubt to kick in.

God has put in place so many people around us that we can relate to, both on a personal and spiritual level. Your burden could just be the very thing that grants you freedom if only you open up to the right people. We cannot do life by ourselves, however when God places good people in our lives, and we know it, do not take that for granted because not everyone has the opportunity of opening up let alone having someone to listen. In other words, it is an opportunity for us to speak to the Father. Whenever you doubt something, check your Faith level.

James 1:6 says: “But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind“. 

In other words, a doubter is someone who does not know where they are heading towards; whether you give them the directions they will deviate and go somewhere else. It is highly crucial that when we doubt ourselves, God remains first in our minds. He should be the first person we run to.

If you lack wisdom, ask! Wisdom is part of the process to removing doubt from our minds. This is shown in James 1:5-8 which reads:

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways”

The same way I worried about my tasks at work, was the same way I ran to God for guidance, and He used someone else to inform me that I was not alone. We must understand that wisdom does not cost a penny. We all have wisdom, the only problem is that at times, we do not apply it in our circumstances. Instead, we allow it to work against us, making us stubborn and to some extent lazy to pray and seek God.

Good wisdom will enable you to stand firm, steadfast and abounding in the works of the Lord at all times. Wisdom will enable you to take your mind of the person that is causing so much grief and to the Father that will exchange your heavy burdens with His light peace. Do not miss the opportunity of experiencing God’s goodness because of your doubt. Your doubt will not change your circumstances, but applying the Word of God and His wisdom will work towards your favor. Instead of doing in your secret challenge, put yourself out there and tell doubt ENOUGH IS ENOUGH! You have all authority through God to put an end to your misery. You are not here to be uncomfortable, but to be steadfast, firm and free.

When doubt comes against us, we have to lift up the shield of Faith. We do this when we open our mouth rather than grumbling and complaining about the problem.

Dear doubt: “You have no control over my life, I take back everything you stole from me, and I am now surrendering it all to God. You are not wanted!”.

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