The ‘Deception’ of Ourselves

Deception 1

Deception & pride is concerned with WHO is right; Humility is concerned with WHAT is right.

Who are you really? Are you trying to put on a front for people to accept you? What are your motives behind what you do in your day-to-day life? These questions require genuine answers. In a world that is influenced by society and material possessions, as believers, we should be reminded that our worth is always in the Lord Jesus Christ. Let nothing in this world take your mind away from the True, most Holy One.

When you wake up every day, what is the first thing on your mind? Is it God? Do you think about what you are going to eat? How about what you are going to wear? No matter our thoughts, we must come to realise that what we think about before we wake up is likely to follow us throughout the day. When your mind is fixated on God every morning, your day will be filled with His goodness! I am a true living witness to that. However, I cannot say that I have been consistent with Him at every moment, but I do get back on my feet and carry on. That helps me to know that I am not deceiving myself. You see some of us today want others to ‘see’ that we have it all together, but it is good to be broken and vulnerable. Why do we hide our insecurities? God can see them all. Or do we just hide them from man? You see, there is a comparative difference between the two. Some hide their fear and pride from God, and others hide them from man.

You can never hide anything from God; you are just wasting your time if you do. With man, on the other hand, there are some things you can hide from them. You had a quiet divorce recently that you don’t want your girlfriends to know, you lost your job and now you are using your savings to keep you going, your secretly a spiteful person but you smile at everyone just to allow people to ‘see’ that you are being nice. These things God understands. Yes, at times our speech can be very spiteful towards others, but why is this the case? Don’t think just because your neighbor is dressed to impress and looking means that she has it all together. Some put on a show to cover up the pain; the make-up, the nice hair, the car, the partner etc, all these things can be cover-ups for the real anguish within ones’ heart.


Ladies, I cannot emphasise enough how GOOD it is to be broken in the eyes of God. We will not always have it together, do you know why? Because pride is likely to kick in. We will start to think that we have come this far in our lives, but we must always have in our minds that if it were not for THE LORD that was on our side, we would have been CONSUMED (Psalm 124:1-2). David knew that if the Father was not on his side, he would have been defeated, but he humbled himself saying that he is NOTHING with God. We must have this same mentality, to not always think that we must have it all together and that we can still be used whilst in pain. David was in so much agony that in 2 Samuel 22:7 he said “In my distress I called upon the Lord, to my God I called. From His temple, He heard my voice, and my cry came to His ears“.

When you think you have everything all together, you won’t be able to pray like David did. It takes a humbled-minded person to be naked with God and tell Him the real deal. Tell him how bad it hurts, although He already knows. Most people would say “but why do I need to tell God my pain if He already knows?” Well, why not? Remember His word says that we should cast our burdens onto Jesus for He cares for us 1 Peter 5:7. The Father knows your weak points, that is why He wants you to cast them over to Him. He may not get you out of the situation when you want Him to, but He promises in His word to be WITH YOU! This is something to be very happy about! Do you know how long I have been wanting God to take me out of my predicament? But He kept telling me, “I will be with you”. That was the comfort I needed to keep me going in my journey with Him.

Rather than me thinking, I had it all together, He was reminding me that He knew everything that had happened to me, and all I had to do was relax and know that He is God. There is no point trying to fix every detail of your life, He is the best craftsman to fix it up for you. Stop trying to do Gods job and allow Him to work in your life. We deceive ourselves in so many different ways. The usual: “How are you?” then you say “I’m fine, thanks”, with that smile emoji…. Remember if you do not have it all together right now, it is for a good reason! God wants you to be reminded that without Him, nothing can be made possible. You won’t be able to see the fruit of your labor if you keep doing everything by yourself. Remember that it is God that gives you the Power to make wealth (Deuteronomy 8:18), and without Him, everything you planned to achieve will just fail. Quit choking yourself up, swallow that pride and let Him have His way. At the same time, I know how it feels to hide your pain away, but you can’t hide it from the Father. Some hide their pain due to fear and shame but there is simply nothing to be upset about. Your pride doesn’t want you to leave it, but you can’t allow it to keep you bound all the time. 

Girl, if you are not fine, please be honest. No one is going to look down on you because you may not have it all together. To be honest, there are some ladies who are waiting for you to be vulnerable towards them so that they too can be real with what they are going through. Yes, it happens at times. I was usually a quiet person back in my days, but now as I am walking closer with the Lord, He has enabled me to open up to the right people, but most importantly to Him. God does not want you to keep lying to yourself thinking that you have it all together. Yes, you can say “it is well” but do you REALLY BELIEVE IT IS WELL? Or are you just saying it because it sounds nice? Remember you don’t have to lie to make others happy. Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, but those who act faithfully are his delight (Proverbs 12:22). Remember, you have to be HUMBLE ENOUGH to say that though he slay me, YET shall I trust Him (Job 13:15).

Deception 2

You are the one that must take responsibility for your life and actions, and eventually, you will enjoy the benefits of Gods Grace. Recognise when something is dead in your life, whether it is a friendship, a relationship, an addiction, all these things must be rectified and put to bed so that you are free from what kept you bound in the first place. The deception of ourselves can be dangerous if we are not sincere. Remember that God is not moved by your emotions, HE IS MOVED BY YOUR FAITH. Bishop TD Jakes kept saying in some of his recent sermons that why do people think Christians always have to have it all together 24/7? Let us be real here, who is going to be happy 24/7? Yes, we have the Father and we SHOULD be happy that we have life and can breathe, but can you honestly say you are happy every second? There will be some things that will come to memory and will trigger you. God knows that we will have heavy days and painful moments, but through it all, He is willing and eager to help us along the way. You just have to be true to yourself.

He knows that we will have shortcuts, but does that mean we should deceive ourselves by saying we have it all together? Remember that you do not control your life, God does because the steps of a good man are ONLY ordered by Him (Psalm 37:23). Our steps are being led by the Father, and this is where deception will eventually rub off because God cannot bless a proud heart. He can’t be surrounded by people who want to control their lives and the decisions they make. Who are we really fooling by working so hard to make everyone around us look as if we have it together? Do you know how much effort that takes? Ladies, it is effort! You can’t keep worrying about how others define you as. Do you know who YOU are in the Lord? Are you allowing people to define you by how they see you, or your past mistakes? You can’t be victorious if you are going around seeking approval from man. God is the One whom you seem for approval and validation.

Man will love you and hate you tomorrow, but Gods love is unconditional!

Come out of your comfort zone and be free! Stop allowing deception to get the best of you! You are bought with a precious price and don’t need to put the whole burden on yourself. Why not allow the Father to take your pain away? Learn to be consistent with the Father, day-to-day. Never allow a day to pass you by where you don’t tell Him how you feel. It is very important that every false assumption, every negative pride, every boastful heart is surrendered to God before you start your day unless it will keep following you around. It is draining and does not help matters at all. Give yourself the Peace you deserve and allow the Father to heal you from deception. In order to be healed, you have to always walk in the Spirit, meaning that you have to study the Word day and night (Joshua 1:8), and meditate on it. Pray over what you have read and ask the Father to help you apply it. We can all be INTENTIONAL about studying God’s Word and make it fun!

Galatians 6:7-8 “Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life”.

Wise Waiting


Quoted from The Wait book New York’s Best Times Seller from DeVon Franklin & Meagan Good:

“The wait is a time to heal when the only one that matters is you. Some of the world’s largest greatest success stories are about people who knew that nothing they did could influence events in their favor, so they chose to wait for conditions to shift”.

When I read this, I had to re-assess my mind pattern and ask myself if I met this criteria. When things doesn’t go the way we expect it to be, do we position our minds to be at rest, or do we stress ourselves thinking that it will eventually sort itself out? The only person that can handle problems is YOU. You are in control of you thoughts, decisions, and circumstances that come your way. People who are intentional are the very people who know how to roll with the punches of life. They know that life will not always go the way they planned it to be, so they learn to adjust, and this is what some of us including myself needs to activate in our lives.

I have been in many predicaments where over-thinking did not do anything for me other than make my attitude bitter and negative. If you do not tackle the problem now, it will affect you so much that anything you plan on  doing will fail, whether its to study a book or confront an issue. Your character won’t allow you to do these things because your mind is being abused. Why do I say your mind is being abused? I’ll inform you. It is being abused because you are not giving it time to heal; you are desperate to find out why people hurt you, so you abuse other people with the hurt you received from others. Overtime, you will develop a character that people will be afraid of because you choose not to wait for the right time for your breakthrough. No matter who you are, you will never get everything your way; that is a fact. Show me a man or woman today who has received everything at a time they planned for it to come, and I will show you someone who did not have it easy but worked hard to receive all they have.

Ladies, there is no short-cut to success! Some people want to take the easy route and dodge most of the pot holes, but unfortunately, there will be bumps and side roads along the way, and we must learn to adjust to these issues. Unless you try to shift your way to the top with bad motives, you will still face the consequences because it truly takes time to be successful; it is not an overnight thing. A lot of people today glamorize success by the amount of money you have. That is not the only way to define success, so do not stress yourself over your financial status. There is more to life than being defined by your financial stability. If your calling is to be a leader, it is going to take time to operate, not only for the benefit of yourself, but because God has entrusted you to lead His people who you are going to make an impact towards. If I may ask, what are you waiting for? Are you aware that having a family takes time, being self-employed takes time, writing your first book takes time, but what matters is that you stay consistent with a positive attitude all at the same time. This is called wise waiting.

An influential philosopher St. Thomas Aquinas said that:

“A person is said to be patient, because he/she acts in a praiseworthy manner by enduring things which hurt him/her here and now and is not unduly saddened by them”.

I will not forget these few words “praise-worthy manner”. If that is all I can get from this statement, it is fine by me. Now I know to some it seems weird to have a praise worthy manner when the odds are against you, but compare yourself to a person that despite the odds against him or her, they refuse to give it to their emotions because they know they could end up doing something foolish, relative to someone who has been attacked and still managers to keep it going with a positive attitude. Imagine we all had this mannerism that regardless of what comes our way, we still remain in the attitude of praise. What impact will it make towards those around you? Do you not realise that your character rubs off on others who are in your life? Your inner circle is influenced by the way you speak, act and think. It does take time, however to know who you are (your character) you must learn to face these attacks head on because how you handle your situations will determine how far you will go in life. Who are you really? Are you a nice person on Sunday morning when you arrive at church, then switch into a bitter individual on Monday going to work? I know it is not always being who you are around people, but if you have to change for people to like you, I suggest you re-assess your friends. I would strongly dislike to be in an environment where I have to constantly keep changing just to please people. For those who are struggling to know their friends, this is for you. I waited approximately a year to have such good friends, and cannot thank God enough for them all. True friends are very rare these days and I had to wait scared, worried, anxious, but it worked out for me.

It takes wisdom to wait patiently, particularly when it is something that not only benefits you but those around you. Your level of waiting will determine your ability to succeed in life. God Himself requires us to wait on Him, even if it means not doing what our usual schedule is. A song that gets me excited when I’m feeling overwhelmed is called Wait on the Lord. The words go like this: “Wait on the Lord, He knows what you need, He’ll give it to you just in time, wait on the Lord. They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings like eagles, wait on the Lord”. (Isaiah 40:31). When it feels like everything is against me, I just take time out of my busy schedule and wait on Him patiently. I must discipline my mind to stop going ahead of Him and allowing my “got to do everything now” mentality to rest. Yes it is easier said than done because God does require us to take responsibility for some circumstances, but NOT to constantly worry about them.

Wait 1

You can be one of the politest person but you will still face attacks, no-one is immune to attacks. We will encounter problems in different stages of our lives. God does not require us to wait to punish us. Before, when I wasn’t a mature Christian, I would assume God to deliberately allow me to wait, as I would always see other people’s statuses on Facebook about how God brought them out of their personal situations and how blessed they were to have their first job after graduation, or getting married, or even setting up their own business. I looked up to Heaven and said “Lord, what about me”, He said “Keep waiting”. Do you think this was easy to hear? No, it wasn’t, but instead I obeyed. I didn’t question the Lord because I was convinced in my heart that He knew what He was doing. Take it like this: you have run out of batteries, you have plugged in your phone and now there is nothing to do but sit and wait. Whilst waiting, you know it really only takes a matter of minutes, you start to feel tense and anxious, wondering how long this could possibly take. Have you been in this position? I have many times. Charging your phone is not always comfortable especially when you need it desperately. But this is where our test comes from. God is not testing your ability to wait, He is testing how well you BEHAVE while you wait. It is easy to plug in a phone and leave it to charge whilst you have another task to do, but when your task involves using your phone, He will see your true intentions and test your ability to see how long you are willing to let to phone charge without allowing your mind to wonder.

While the majority of us is in a hurry, God is not usually in a hurry because He knew us even before we were in our mothers wombs (Jeremiah 1:5). God tends to be slow when it comes to blessing His children because only He knows when we are ready for it. God will not give you what you cannot handle; He knows what you can take and what you can’t take so learn to be content with what you have, and wait for the best to come. The problem with waiting is not having all the details. From our perspective, we have everything figured out and we want God to move within our time-frame, but this is not always going to be the case. We should not perceive the Father as Santa Clause only going to Him when we need a gift, but should be a time where we express our trust in Him knowing that He is working everything out for our good whilst we wait. God always has good reasons for making us wait. Waiting is a part of life and one of God’s tools for developing people. Yes it won’t be easy, but this is where your true character comes out. Are you someone who can wait wisely? If you do not have a journal, I suggest you buy one. Write out all the times where you were tempted to complain and compare it to the days where you were happy. See which one is most popular and determine your level of waiting from the results.

Moral of today’s blog post:

  1. Waiting reveals our true motives
  2. Waiting builds patience in our lives
  3. Waiting transforms our character
  4. Waiting builds dependency and intimacy on God

Wait 2

I Didn’t Let It Choke Me


The feeling that we receive when we hear bad news or when the people you are surrounded with are constantly negative that it even affects the way you operate. Everyone has a decision to make and it must be one that you should not feel bad about or would need to justify. There are various situations that I have encountered where my flesh was put to the test. I was so eager to retaliate out of my feelings, but something deep down told me to hush.

Ladies, we must come to a realization that what people meant for evil, God will turn it around for your good (Genesis 50:20). Let us focus on the story of Joseph in the book of Genesis chapter 50. Here, we see that Joseph had two brothers whom he loved dearly. As time went on, God showed Joseph a vision of the dream He planned to fulfill in His life; until he told his dream to his brothers. When the brothers found out about his dream, they turned from being kind to being envious. Now that is a dangerous thing because it’s one thing for a friend to change in a heartbeat, but for your own family member to turn against you like that is painful!

So what did these brothers do? They sold Joseph into slavery for 22 years in Egypt! What really amused me was the fact that Joseph did not hold any grudges on his brothers. I wonder if it would have happened to any of us whether we would actually let go or want to revenge back. The pain that Joseph faced was so severe that it could have choked him. But GUESS WHAT, IT DIDN’T! I’ll tell you why. Joseph’s brothers stood before him as Prime Minister of Egypt. They did not recognise him and he holds their fate in his hands. Although Joseph knew that his brothers were with him, Joseph did not talk about the incident. Joseph made sure that no one in Egypt would ever know that they had done to him. Remember ladies that perfect love casts out fear (1 John 4:18). Some of us in this scenario would want to pounce back on the culprit, but Joseph was wise enough to know that the battle was for the Lord; for that reason he didn’t allow the situation to choke him as well as his future.

God knows the weaknesses of your offenders that caused them to hurt you, but you must bear in mind that the same way you would want to judge or retaliate with the offender is the same way God will deal with you. Matthew 7:2 says “You will be judged in the same way that you judge others”. Joseph’s brothers genuinely did not know it was Joseph and was stunned with surprise. When they approached Joseph, Joseph then revealed himself and told them that he was their brother, the one who sold him for 22 years in Egypt. The most humbling thing to me was that Joseph even comforted his brothers for what they had done, so in other words he didn’t feel the need to intimidate them. When you are able to over-look the pain of what someone did to you in your past, you are a MATURE Christian! It is not always easy to be one I tell you; the majority of the time, our flesh wants to take over, but we have to develop self-control.

In particular, Joseph did not want his brothers to fear him, but to love him regardless of what they did. He wanted restoration and not revenge. How many of us can truthfully say we want restoration for our enemies? This is why Joseph didn’t choke and was able to obtain the promises God had for him. He knew that the long-term benefits of healing a relationship far outweighed any short-term satisfaction we would get from retaliation. Joseph understood that only when you release your offender that you set yourself free. Joseph wanted his brothers to know that they are accepted and will not use their sin against them. This too is the kind of love our Father shows us daily because He never brings up our past mess or keeps us at arm’s length because of our failures. Just as Joseph showed love and compassion to his brothers, it is the same way God too desires us to show love to other people; a love that doesn’t want them to feel afraid in your presence.

Imagine going to university or to a family gathering, and everyone looking at you in a weird way. How would that honestly make you feel? For me personally, I wouldn’t feel comfortable. So it is very important how you treat people and how you make them feel. Bear in mind that God has been so Faithful to each and every one of us so we too must be careful not to lay a guilt trip on others. Often it is your forgiveness that makes it possible for others to forgive themselves. What if you know of someone who cannot forgive themselves on what they did to you in the past, that the only way they can be free is if you tell them you accept their apology? Have you noticed that some commit suicide because of a friends unforgiving attitude? Yes what the person may have done was wrong, I am not disputing that, but for someone to go to that extent of taking their own life for a friend! Eish that must wake someone up today! Let us not wait until it is too late to forgive our offenders. Remember forgiveness is a gift that you give to yourself; it is for you to be free and enjoy what God promises you to have.

Choke 2

Nothing is heavier than guilt because:

  • It will drag you down – emotionally and mentally!
  • It will destroy your relationships – you would only be using the new relationship to numb the pain of the old one!
  • It will destroy your health – because you are not built to carry resentment!

God will always use the things that people plan against you to work out FOR YOUR GOOD! That is just how He works. Everything you and I have been through that has tried to bring us down one way or the other is working out in our favor. Friends that promise you to do something and fail to do it is working out for your good. I have learnt not to rely too much on people because things are subject to change, and in this life we will eventually step on each others toes, but as long as we are willing to NOT BECOME BITTER ABOUT IT, and let go of the situation is where God can step in and give us His Peace. This is a new level of forgiveness! When you preserve the dignity and self-worth of others, God will do the same for you also. With full knowledge of our sinful past, He covers us with the garment of Grace, and He expects us to do the same to others. The Bible says “Be full of love for others, following the example of Christ who loved you and gave Himself to God as a sacrifice to take away our sins”.

When you forgive, there is no place for self-righteousness. With Joseph, he wasn’t being condescending or patronising, nor was he thinking, “I’ll be admired for being so gracious”, No! During his years in prison, God had moved on his heart and changed his attitude. So when Joseph said “You meant evil against me, but God meant it for good (Genesis 50:20), he really meant it. This was why Joseph was a step ahead of his brothers, and for this reason it made his brothers respect him the more. When you consider that God knows all about your sin YET promises to keep it a closely guarded secret, it should:

  1. Increase your sense of humility and gratitude
  2. Cause you to keep your mouth shut
  3. Make you refuse to hold anybody else’s sins and shortcomings over their head

True forgiveness must be practiced every day, and I know it won’t always be easy because we are all human and have feelings. Sure, it is easy to accept someone’s wrongdoing when they admit their offences, but if that is how you want to live all the time you may never experience victory. WHAT YOU DON’T FORGIVE, YOU WILL HAVE TO RE-LIVE IT! So for your own sake take back your life and keep walking! Although keeping your head high after an offence has come goes against our carnal nature, there is a high chance others may never know you truly forgave their offences. You certainty don’t want it to choke you, so why not just do it sincerely? Your heart might even break as you watch God bless your offender in answer to your prayers. The Bible says that Job’s suffering ended and his prosperity was restored once he was able to pray for those who had become a thorn in his side (Job 42:10). It takes a whole lot from you to pray for someone to receive their blessings while they have hurt you, but this is Christ’s standard of forgiveness. Imagine Jesus allowed his haters words to get to him, would he have won the Victory? I doubt it, but truly if the knew that Jesus was the Son of God, they would not have crucified Him. Some people do not know what they are doing when they try to offend you. 

Choke 1

True forgiveness is the medicine that heels the deepest emotional wounds you have faced. It closes the door on the past and gives you Grace and motivation to move forward and enjoy the life God wants you to live. For all I know, all the sins we have committed are being recorded, so we have no other option but to just live right, love right and forgive right. Do not allow anything to choke you! Temporary satisfaction of revenge is not worth losing a long-term blessing for. Don’t allow your enemies to see you choking, instead let them see you love. Pray for those who despitefully use you (Matthew 5:44-45). Ladies, do not allow anything to steal your joy. There is so much more to life than allowing something so petty as a small argument that pushes you to make emotional decisions on a temporary situation. Be wise with your life and live it well in LOVE! God did not create you to choke, He desires you to enjoy life and have it more abundantly! (John 10:10). 

Note to remember: “Do not allow the hurts caused by temporary people block your path of your ‘FOREVER PEOPLE’. Clear the way for those will enhance your life.

Choke 3

A person who does not forgive hates their own self!


As human beings, we tend to look at others and their faults, not realizing that we too are aren’t perfect. It can seem as if everyone puts the blame on you but they never see that they too have hurt others. It is where we must choose to let go and forgive or keep the grudge in our hearts and create bitterness. Our lives as women of God should be pleasure, pure and meek. There should never be a time in our lives where we hold grudges on people for a length of time because it does not change the way people act towards you. You have to choose to forgive those who have hurt you because you are not perfect yourself.

Jesus did not have to die for us but He chose to do so. We are worthless, and He is worthy, and because of His blood we are covered in Him. When I reflect back on those who have hurt me, my flesh at times wants to retaliate, however when I think about the beatings and wounds they placed on Jesus, for Him to go through the pain for you and I should take away our pride and forgive. There is a reason why God gave us two ears and one mouth; so that we can listen more and talk less. When a friend has offended you, listen to the person. Not everyone around you desires to hurt you intentionally. Some on the other hand have been through secret painful moments that all they can do is pass the hurt onto you. We have all been there when something or someone has hurt us, and instead of solving the problem with a friend, we take it out on them.

People like this do not have love in their hearts because someone who loves would not emotionally strain a friend but would want their support. Why is it today that we find it so hard to forgive? Don’t you know that forgiveness opens so many doors to your blessings? Even though you may be prospering physically, spiritually you are weak because you chose not to forgive. Forgiveness is a hard topic for some of us to digest; at times it becomes underestimated and abused, because we say we forgive with our mouths, but our hearts are far away from it. When you hear your friend talking about the person that hurt you, all of a sudden your mind becomes stiff and hard to operate because you have chosen to open up the wound of what your friend did to you in the past. Darling, you are not living in the pas, you are living in the NOW! Don’t allow your past to dictate your present situation, else you’ll think you’re moving forward, but really you are going two steps backwards.


Lets take a look at what the Bible says about the power of forgiveness:

  1. Mark 11:25 – “And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses”.
  2. Matthew 6:15 – “But if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses”.
  3. Matthew 18:22-22 – “Then Peter came up and said to him, “Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven”.
  4. James 5:16 – “Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working”.
  5. Luke 17:3-4 – “Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him”.

Remember a person who does not forgive hates their own self! When you love yourself, you will find it easy to forgive. When you want God to open a door for you, you will have no choice but to let go. Delayed blessings may hurt for a while, but you must have at the back of your mind that if you choose not to forgive, don’t expect an extraordinary blessing. Even when you can’t forgive yourself, you will find it hard to progress in life. I personally found it hard to forgive myself when I was a teenager. I didn’t realise that regardless of what I did, God still loved me, but at that time I wasn’t spiritually strong. Until I continued to take my personal journey with God, that is when I realised that when I was unfaithful, He is STILL FAITHFUL!


Forgiving other people is a strength. It is only a fool that keeps bitterness in their hearts. What makes you enjoy life without forgiveness? Impossible! It won’t work because you’ll keep dwelling on the problem rather than finding a solution. When you think about a struggle for so long, it will drain you mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. Your social life will deteriorate and you will start to close your heart and become bitter. Stop memorizing what people have done to you, and remind yourself daily that you are forgiven by Christ! It does not matter what you have done or what someone has done to you. What makes you a bigger person is choosing to forgive. We all want God to open doors for us right? How can this by done? By listening and obeying the Word of God. Remember Luke 17:3-4 talks about how you must rebuke your neighbor if he/she sins against you and if he/she changes, you must forgive. No matter the amount of times someone has hurt you, choose to let go because no matter what happens, you will be worse off than the offender.

If God had not included forgiveness in His plan for humanity, none of us would enjoy life renewed with Him in heaven. Without forgiveness there would be no hope at all.

Because of God’s nature, He forgives on a daily basis. If there were no forgiveness at all, we will live a miserable life. You will start hating yourself the more, start breaking things in the house, until you COME BACK TO YOUR SELF and realise everything you have broken has to be replaced. Your anger does not have to involve breaking the house down, whether psychically or verbally to your siblings and parents, but can be solved through genuine prayer through seeking God. If God can forgive us of our sins, why can’t we too forgive others? Remember that forgiveness is not for the weak. Being able to forgive those who have wronged you is a mark of spiritual strength and confidence. When you forgive, you grow, your heart begins to heal, your back straightens up, your eyes clear so that you can see clear, so that you can see the road ahead. Anger is a spiritual sickness; but when you forgive you live. 

When I think about the Cross, my heart tightens because of the sacrifice Christ made for You and I. Even when the chief officers were accusing and spitting on Him, Christ did not retaliate but instead He said “Father forgive them for they don’t know what they are doing (Luke 23:24). Could you pray for your enemies like that? Even if one was to spit on you, could you humble yourself enough to not retaliate but just pray? It was not easy for Jesus and certainly it won’t always be easy for us, but because of the love that God has for Christ and ourselves, He will give us the strength and GRACE to forgive!

For those who may not be Christians or are new to the Faith, it won’t always be easy to forgive or receive forgiveness. 1 John 1:9 says; “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness”.  It really is that simple! This is not just a confession though.  We all have confessed words in our lives that we didn’t feel regret for. This type of confession described here is a confession of heart-felt shame from what we have done and that is what brings humility and meekness. This is a confession of remorse for what has taken place. This remorse goes hand-in-hand with repentance because when you cry out to God for His forgiveness of your sins, you must not forget about your repentant heart; a repentant heart is a healthy heart. Without it, you will fall right back into the same sin.


Sisters, choose today to forgive all who have hurt you. Remember no one knows tomorrow, but because God lives we CAN face tomorrow. Every word that is uttered from your lips is being recorded by God in Heaven, so choose what you say wisely to your fellow brothers and sisters. Do not allow your anger to control you but be an example of Christ on earth. You want to be rewarded for the good things you have done on earth. God is not someone who will hold your guilt against you; it is you that is holding it against you. Without forgiveness, nothing in your life will satisfy you. You can eat as much as you like, drink as much as you like, party as much as you like, but without forgiveness, you are living a life without oxygen!

To conclude ladies, enjoy the life that God granted you and choose to let go and forgive. Forgiveness is a strength not a weakness! Never bring up a past fault of what someone did, especially when they are very apologetic. Put yourself in other people’s shoes and see how you treat them, for how you treat people will determine how God will bless you.

Remember, forgiveness warms the heart and cools the sting!

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You have to love what prospers you!


You have to love what prospers you ladies. Why are we so faithful to disloyalty? To people who we know don’t like us? I know how hard it can be to keep everyone happy, but do yourself a favor and say “ENOUGH!”. There will be times in your life where you’ll be tested through different sorts of people and circumstances, and will have to make a decision on how to continue living your life. I have been through various stages in my early 20’s where I felt used and taken advantage of. I realised that in life those who are being treated unfairly will rise above it all! When they rise, that is where all hell breaks loose simply because people enjoy you being lower than them. When they see you’re getting confidence, they’ll eventually become bitter and resentful.

Well I hate to break it to you sister, but you need to RISE BACK UP AGAIN! If you are having a hard time right now, trying to figure out why people are changing, speak to the Lord Jesus! He knew how it felt when the people he loved changed especially when He needed them the most (in reference to His disciples when they slept instead of praying with Jesus – Luke 22:39-46). He knew how it felt to be taken advantage of. He also knew how much he had a loving Father who knew all this was going to happen. Despite all the drama, He still chose to love them. Now I do not know about you, but the world we are living in today, it can be so difficult loving those who drain us. Sometimes we find it hard to cut them off for fear of being lonely. But let me challenge you a little bit; would you rather let go and be free, or stay stuck in an environment (your comfort zone) where you cannot grow because people are hindering your success?

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The only antidote that can prosper you is The Word of God!! “This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success”. (Joshua 1:8). If you do not make time for the Bible, I strongly encourage you to do so! The Word has everything you and I are going through and currently facing. It is important to have intimacy with the Father so that we are able to hear when the Holy Spirit is speaking. We should always refuse to allow our flesh to overtake because words can be uttered and not taken back. Maybe you can trace a time in your life where a loved one hurt you; stepped on your toe a bit too much! Up till now, you are still finding it hard to forgive, but something keeps telling you to let go of this person. You still love the person but they are not helping you achieve your fullest potential. It takes humility and STRENGTH to let people go, and you must bear in mind is this person enabling you to prosper?? Be honest with yourself…

T.D. Jakes says “When people can walk out of your life, let them walk because your destiny is NOT tied to theirs”. We must stop allowing ourselves becoming agitated or stressed about other people and start focusing on ourselves, because where God is taken you is not where He is taking your friends. We all have different paths to take, so ensure you do not miss your opportunity. Comparison is the thief of joy, so refuse to look to others and look up! In fact, have some ME TIME TODAY! Take this opportunity to reflect on your life and see how far you have come and where you intend to go. The more time you spend investing in yourself and your future, the less time you’ll worry about what people define you as.

I have come to a point in my life where cutting people off has become so easy. Why? Because I knew how it felt a few years ago to hold on to heavy baggage that was weighing me down. I also had to examine the people who were in my life and the impact they would have made if they were genuine. There are some people today that won’t allow you to be the person you are; people not allowing you to be free; controlling friends; ungrateful friends, those who spoke bad behind my back. These are all the dead-weights that are draining our day-to-day lives and it needs to be CUT OFF!! As we are approaching 2016 very soon, let us set a strong foundation for the year, and use it to pray and intercede! Ask God what He wants you to accomplish and inform Him of your personal hearts desires so that He will fulfill it. Be Faithful in communicating with God. Examine the whole year of 2015 and reflect on it; what have you learnt this year and how can you use what you’ve learnt to benefit 2016?

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You must endeavour to surround yourself with people who will take you up another level; those who are willing to challenge and deliver you out of your comfort zone. I met a couple of lovely women this year who are authentic and can relate to me when I open up to them. It is very important to know how to surround yourself with good people. I was speaking to a dear friend of mine recently and was reminding her of how precious she is in the Lord’s eyes. Sometimes as women, we don’t always feel worthy because of a past memory or something we have done. If we are not careful, we can be faithful to our past that we miss the opportunity of being blessed. Although our past is kin to our future, it does not give us the right to wallow in it. Our past should only be an indication that our future is going to be beautiful! Amen!!

Now what I am going to talk about next may not be some people’s favourite topic, but I am going to say it anyway. In Malachi 3:10 it reads “Bring the full tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. And thereby put me to the test, says the Lord of hosts, if I will not open the windows of heaven for you and pour down for you a blessing until there is no more need”. Now giving is an ACT OF WORSHIP UNTO THE LORD. Giving is saying that you choose the GIVER OVER THE GIFT, and put your own personal desires aside, and is confident that the Lord will provide all your needs in His time. Those who give more are likely to receive more, HOWEVER TO WHOM MUCH IS GIVEN, MUCH IS REQUIRED! (Luke 12:48). Now please do not misunderstand me here, you can only give on the level you are already on. If you earn £1,000 a month, you know that giving God £100 is essential as it is 10% off your earnings. For those who may be earning about £500 a month, you ought to give £50 as it is 10% off your earnings. But if you could trust God to give above £50; lets say £65, that is a leap of Faith, and you will see how God will open up the windows of Heaven and pour you out a blessing that you won’t even have enough room to receive. On the other hand some find it very difficult to give for fear of having less. Well ladies, have you heard of this saying before “When you keep things dear to your heart you will lose it”.

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Bare in mind that God is able to make all Grace abound to you, so that having all-sufficiency in all things at all times, you may abound in every good work (2 Corinthians 9:8). Being generous not only to God but to others will enable every good work to follow you. It is important to understand that giving is an act of appreciation to the person that gave you the blessing in the first place. Let us endeavour to be thankful for those who pour out their hearts to us, especially our Spiritual sisters and brothers in Christ.

I leave this brief but powerful message to you sisters. Do not be deceived by this world for what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses his soul? (Mark 8:36). It does not matter how much you have, but how are you using it to glorify God? These are the things that should make you prosper, not to get your girlfriends jealous, but to encourage them to be Christ-like so in due season they too will receive the promises that God had for them. What prospers you should be peace, joy, happiness, laughter, unity, humility but moreover LOVE! Let love continue to uplift and prosper you and it will generate a strong aroma. Use this time God has given you to fulfill your purpose, help your fellow sisters, let them know they are not alone in their circumstances. Let us live in love and continue to reach to those things that prosper us. If you do not know your God-given purpose, just pray and humbly ask what He wants you to do. Remember you are a chosen generation called forth to show His excellence! 🙂



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