J.U.N.E.

Half way down the year…it has been a journey. Before I move forwards, I want to take this opportunity to invite you to the book launch event: From Brokenness to Completion, held on Saturday 22nd July. To sign up, all you need to do is click on the link and enter your name and email address: https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/from-brokenness-to-completion-book-launch-tickets-34525473621. This event is for men and women so if you know of anyone that would benefit, please do not hesitate to let them know. Spread the word! 🙂

June has taught me so much. The thoughts that ran through my mind were to an extent mind-blowing, but it taught me some good stuff. It was as if my patience and trust in God was being tested. I didn’t know what it felt like to take rest, as I was always up at night reading my book, ensuring that it was immaculate before publishing. There were times it felt like I could not cope, but God always seems to find a way to keep me going. My mind would be at a place of peace, and then worry, and then rest, and then anxiety. You will realise that when you are near to finish a project, that is when the enemy comes in like a flood, trying to stop you from fulfilling your purpose. But I had to keep striving, acknowledging the fact that His Presence is with me in all I do. Was I tired, of course! My sleeping pattern changed at times, but I realised that in the end it was all worth it. All the tears and sweat really did work out for my favour.

Laziness and procrastination are the two most dangerous distractions that cause us to be comfortable. Life is not all about being comfortable, it is how you see the circumstances of life and how to create peace within the storm that gets you to the next level. I can’t emphasise enough on how 2017 has equipped me mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. I have had days where I felt like doing nothing, but the Lord keeps telling me to go forward, to not worry too much about what I can’t see happening right now. When we don’t see the result, we end up being frustrated and fed up. But in this season, I’ve learnt the beauty of letting go and allowing God to take full control. Not to be led by my feelings or my knowledge. I can’t be my own counsellor. I must stop trying to make everything work in my power and giving it to the One that knows me best.

Remember that it is okay to not be okay at times. You can cry, you can have your private space, you won’t always get it right, but through it all, you gain strength, wisdom and the ability to remain firm despite the uncertainty of life. June has taught me to pray harder, not just for my personal life, but for the world. The United Kingdom needs our prayers; so much is going on – people are dying unexpectedly, innocent lives are being taken, but I know my God doesn’t sleep. He sees all and knows all.

Finally, I want to leave you with this: when you worry what does it do for you? When you think about your life and the plans you made, did it happen for you or not? If it did, praise God; if it didn’t, how to you take it? It could be teaching you to have more patience and a thankful heart. Don’t ever look down on what God has placed in your heart, whether you see it working on your behalf or not. Every day is a sign that you have been put here for a purpose. Let the remaining months of 2017 teach you something valuable. Do not give up, no matter what you are going through. It will all be worth it in the end.

NOTE: From brokenness to completion – you are still a work in progress!

 

April – Transparency, Favour, Tears, Blessings

A month full of transparency, brokenness, laughter and recovery. I have experienced what it feels like to be up and what it feels to be low. I have seen many couples celebrating weddings and engagements. I have fallen for people who didn’t realise my worth. I nearly forgot who I was for someone who was as broken as I was, so I came to myself. Then again, we are human, God understands how we are and how we feel; we fall, we stumble, we cry, but in the end, we get up and keep moving forward because life never stops, you see. I used one harsh product on my face that made the skin under my eyes break out. No amount of foundation could cover it, but thankfully I rectified it by using my normal facial products. Dry skin gone! mini-testimony No matter how many times you want to change something, your usual comfort zone will always be your preferred choice. In times of hardship and conflict, it is in the midst of it all that you find God’s Hand in your life. Indeed, I saw it all.

Sometimes, my words can’t really express how I feel because my tears don’t allow me to utter a word. I’m just consumed by the heaviness in my heart that prevents me from hearing God’s voice, YET He still finds a way to deliver me. He is my King and Saviour. Just because I smile doesn’t mean you know what I am going through. It applies to everyone; despite it all, I am learning to embrace the beauty of God and His kind, gentle character. He is slow to speak and quick to love. His love silences my fears. Perhaps I was feeding my mind with negative thoughts without realising, or maybe I wanted to be my own counsellor? Hmm…

Every insecurity and low self-esteem have to give way to Almighty God because our problems are insignificant in the Lord’s eyes. I have witnessed blessings that I was not expecting. Instead of complaining, I chose to embrace it and cherish it as my own. I understand that what we ask for won’t always be giving to us when we expect it, but only in accordance with God’s timing. I was broken at the same time as blessings can bring burdens. There is pressure in enjoying what God has given you – understanding that there are people who are in their seasons. One must be careful of what to say when plans are going well for you but not the other person. If one is emotionally weak, you will fall for it and start becoming resentful.

I was humbled by the people I didn’t expect to open up and express how they felt at the time. All I had to do was listen because the pain alone kept me quiet. I didn’t realise people go through so much until they become selfless. I used their story as a reflection of mine. I am not an open book as such, unless relevant and according to the season. Maybe I was trying to stay away from being misunderstood. But I saw it as God prompting me to speak out. It should be noted that every obstacle has an opportunity of being revealed in due course. You can’t force someone to speak out when they are not ready. Give people time to heal, and in the meantime work on yourself; check your heart and inner motives. Their burdens broke me in order to bless them in the end. It wasn’t for my entertainment…

The Easter break, we celebrated the life of Jesus Christ who died on the Cross for mankind! When I ponder on the goodness of Jesus, it humbles me to the extent where nothing that comes my way should move me. He paid an expensive price for you and I. He took our shame and sin away. How deep is His love for us? His love covers ALL my insecurities, my health, my finances, He protects me when going out and coming back. He picks me up and tells me I am fearfully and wonderfully made. He reminds me that no matter what I do or don’t do, it won’t stop Him from loving me.

Where I am positioned now is for a strategic purpose – to serve other people and be a blessing. He teaches me how to enjoy my life and what He has given me; to not be afraid to explore and try out new things. I was able to meet new people and make friends this month. I also accomplished my 2nd book (Completion) which is coming out soon so watch out! Most of my achievements were birthed in April – but guess what, they did not come easy. They came with tears falling down my eyes, as I knelt down to pray by myself. It took sacrifice staying 12 hours every other day after work to finish my project whilst most people went home. It took concentration despite the unnecessary drama. But above all, it took Christ’s sacrifice which was fulfilled on the Cross – all to Him I owe.

To an extent, I was trying to figure out what path God’s taking me to, but I had to stop being so inquisitive and let go naturally. I had to stop worrying my precious mind to prevent it from over-thinking. God speaks clearly but I tend to allow how I feel at that moment take over. I have been spiritually weak and emotionally strong which should be the opposite, but God still has a way to say when you are weak, I AM STRONG! He is the I AM!

I realise that everything that is in my hand is not mine; it is God’s. What I have today is for the Glory of God. It is not mine but He teaches me to use them to bless others. He allows me to enjoy the benefits of my labour because He sees my intentions; not to be above anyone, but at the same time not to underestimate myself. Not to hide my blessings but enjoy them to the fullest. I learnt to open up to hurting people as they were able to do the same. I didn’t realise that broken people were a reflection of me. As they shed a tear, I also shed one or maybe two…

I knew the burden was too heavy to carry so God used them to open up and allow me to relate. I felt so much pain because my mind was focused on image, trying to keep up with everything, not realising there is only so much I could take. I knew my breaking point and put a stop to what made me want to operate in the flesh. I took back my authority from the enemy and started to walk in God’s integrity. I understood that what was stopping me from being free was keeping everything inside; God put people in my life to open up to, so why didn’t I take the advantage, when other people were encouraging me with their issues…

All the insecurities and downfalls made sense in the end – that it was all working out for my good. He reminded me that nothing I went through in April will be wasted. Some have stayed and others have left, but one thing I know for sure is that God will always remain. He is stable and very reliable. He has been with me throughout April, all to Him I owe. I have been misunderstood and I am sure you have too – I guess that is why I am different – there is beauty in being unique. I stand on this greatly.

Most of my greatest strengths came from April; the times I found it difficult to sleep, waking up with countless thoughts on my mind. I had to take a break from my own thoughts and start giving thanks. I couldn’t afford to stay in a box. I am called to do more. Perhaps the handshake the gentleman expressed could be the start of something new…but above all, it has been a month of transparency, favour, tears and blessings.

Be real about what you go through, you won’t always get it right but God is Faithful to examine our hearts.

Thank you, God – I’m ready for MAY!

Peace & Blessings x